Quote:

Socrates

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Hello Reader,

So, we missed a day…
​And today we would be talking about resolutions and why we fail to keep up with our words or decisions.

We make a resolution, keep it for a week, and then fail. It's not that we are weak, but just that we are depending on willpower. Willpower alone doesn’t change formation but most times leads to exhaustion.

When you see yourself getting constant exhaustion with the task or with the habits, then it is most likely only willpower outplayed.

Humans, by ourselves alone, have a limit to how far we can resist or accept a formation of habits. Why? Because you would most likely be going against the tide, the tide of environment, systems, and association.

So, someone can recognise a destructive habit, commit to stopping, and try to use sheer force to resist;
It works for a few days or maybe a few weeks. Then ‘nature’ sets in and pressures him back;
The old pattern rushes back in, often with more force than before.

The person then feels like a failure.
​“I just don’t have enough discipline. I’m too weak. I’ll never change.”

But what is truly happening is that prohibition creates a vacuum.

“Don’t do that” leaves the question hanging: then what should I do?

Every habit we eliminate must be introduced by another habit, and vice versa. If we don’t fill it intentionally, it will be filled automatically, usually with the exact thing you were trying to eliminate.

This is why rules in society would always fail. Think about it.

Because it’s usually focusing on things that shouldn’t be done, with a punishment for them, but it doesn’t always have a counter-practice for that act, or it’s not really concerned with making the satisfactory act possible but focused on enforcing the rule.

And this also plays out in our lives:​
​We set “stop scrolling before bed” without a new evening practice, which would eventually return to scrolling.
We say “we would stop working so much” without cultivating a life outside work, only for us to have an existential crisis and retreat back to the office.

Knowing and wanting aren’t enough because the pattern runs deeper than our conscious choice, but it has become a web, an architecture.

We don’t just delete a habit.
But ensure we are replacing it.

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And that is the difference between suppression and transformation. We are not trying to fight our way through willpower, but by building better structure and nature to ensure our goals and dreams flourish.

Be Determined. Stay Focused.
​Ekerete Lord-kris.
​Hortharn

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Reflection Prompt:

1. What is one "Don't" in your life that currently feels like a vacuum?
2. If you stopped fighting that old habit for a moment, what is the positive practice you could invite in to occupy that space instead?

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Deeper Dive:

• Scriptures: Matthew 12:43–45, Ephesians 4:22–24, Isaiah 43:18–19, Romans 7:14-25
• Book: Atomic Habits by James Clear
• Book: The Spirit of the Disciplines by Dallas Willard

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